


What He's Looking For

by sunnynights



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Campaign: Amnesty (The Adventure Zone), Crushes, Domestic Fluff, Drinking & Talking, Fluff, Gay, M/M, sternclay rights, what I do with bigfoot is none of your business
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:33:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24290608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunnynights/pseuds/sunnynights
Summary: On nights like these, it was so easy for Barclay to forget the reality of his situation: that a thin bracelet of hemp cord was the only thing that kept Stern from arresting him and handing him over to the government.
Relationships: Barclay/Agent Stern (The Adventure Zone)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 156





	What He's Looking For

Barclay scratched his beard. "And where are you three going?"

Dani stopped in her tracks. She pulled her coat tighter with one hand, her other grasped by Aubrey. "Out."

Jake shifted nervously beside them. His eyes flitted to Agent Stern, who was busy struggling with a wine bottle. "Mama said it was okay."

"And does Mama know about the weed in your jacket?"

Dani cooly raised a brow. "Does your boyfriend know about the time you stole a car and some kid's birthday present?"

Aubrey snorted with laughter as Dani pulled her out the front door of Amnesty Lodge. Jake dropped his skateboard and rode on after them, waving at Barclay and Stern.

_Pop!_ Stern uncorked the bottle and began filling a pair of wine glasses. "Should I even ask?" he smiled, handing one to Barclay.

"Seeing as you're an officer of the law, no. It's kind of a long story," He took a long sip. "But I did give the car back."

"That's good. I don't want to have to arrest you."

Barclay leaned back on the couch, letting the wine run over his tongue. The syrupy humidity of a Kepler summer was coming soon, but tonight was perfectly warm and clear. The Lodge was near empty, quiet beyond the serenade of crickets and cicadas. Stern sat beside him, still in his suit but with his jacket off. On nights like these, it was so easy for Barclay to forget the reality of his situation: that a thin bracelet of hemp cord was the only thing that kept Stern from arresting him and handing him over to the government.

"Can I ask you a question?"

Stern blinked. "Of course."

"Why do you want to catch Bigfoot so badly?"

"I have a duty to protect the American people from all threats, supernatural or otherwise."

"Never heard of anyone getting hurt by a sasquatch."

"But they could. I'd rather not wait for that to happen before we start learning about unexplained phenomena."

Barclay shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "What if he's friendly?"

"If he's friendly, we won't have a problem," Stern set down his glass and loosened his tie. "When I was a kid, I thought I saw a ghost. I know it was probably just a shadow or something, but it bothered me that no one ever believed me. A lot of people think my line of work is ridiculous. There are people in my own task force that don't believe in Bigfoot. Maybe it's selfish, but just once, I'd like to be right."

"That _is_ selfish," came Barclay’s wine-sharpened words.

Stern frowned. “Would you say that to a scientist discovering a new species?”

“So Bigfoot is just some kind of animal to you.”

“Yes...well, no...maybe? I don’t know _what_ to consider him, that’s the point.” Stern shook his head. “The way some of you Kepler folk act, it’s like you know him personally.”

Barclay, wide-eyed, busied himself with draining his wine before he finally responded. “It’s a weird town, and we prefer it that way.”

“Have you always lived here?”

For a moment, Sylvain flashed through Barclay’s mind. Glimpses of a world so familiar that he hadn’t seen in decades, a home he could never return to. He refilled his glass. “Nearly.”

Stern lifted his glass and nestled into the couch’s backrest. “I like Kepler. It’s beautiful and quiet. A far cry from D.C.”

“Do you have anyone waiting for you back home?”

Stern laughed softly. “It’s hard to meet men when you’re married to the job. What about you? Are you and Madeline together?”

Barclay choked mid-sip. “No, no, uh, no...she’s not,” he sputtered. “We’re just friends.”

“Oh, good,” Stern let out a breath, grinning. “I thought it was weird that you also called her Mama, but I didn’t want to judge,”

Barclay pulled at his collar, his face flush. “I’m not seeing anyone. Honestly, other than the Lodge, I tend to keep to myself.”

“You’re talking to me,” Stern slid a little closer down the couch.

Barclay smiled. “You’re technically paying me to.”

“Am I going to see wine and conversation on my bill later?”

“Maybe just the wine.” He pushed back his dark, shaggy hair. “How much longer are you staying in town?”

“Until I find Bigfoot.”

“What if you don’t find him?”

“Ned Chicane may be full of it, but his video can’t lie. Bigfoot is here and I _will_ find him.”

Barclay’s stomach turned in knots at the look in Stern’s eye: bright, confident, determined for all the wrong reasons. He also realized he spent far longer than socially acceptable staring into Stern’s eyes. “Kepler is full of strange things, you may get more than you wish for,” he said, forcing his gaze away.

“I already like what I’ve found.”

Stern was close enough for Barclay to know he smelled like sweet wine and subtle cologne. He was already leaning in, Barclay could just close the distance and,

“Hey, Bar...fuck, never mind.”

Barclay jumped backward at the sound and turned around. Mama stood awkwardly in the entryway, looking anywhere but at him and Stern.

“What do you need, Mama?” Barclay got up, trying to sound casual.

She put up a hand. “Nah, I can care of it. It’s just Duck. Y’all just, keep...doin.”

“Shit, is Duck in trouble?”

“He radioed me sayin he caught Dani, Jake, and Aubrey in the Monongahela,” She eyed Stern. “Smoking some substances.”

Barclay groaned. “Please don’t tell I’m picking them up from the sheriff’s office.”

“This is Duck Newton we’re talking about. He _may or may not_ have joined them and now needs a ride home.”

Barclay rolled his eyes. “I’ll take care of it.”

Mama nodded and slipped back into her office. Stern cleared his throat.

“I think I’ll get to bed,” he said, wiping his palms on his pants. “Uh, thank you. For sitting with me and,”

Barclay cut off his sentence by wrapping his hand in Stern’s tie. He tugged him forward and kissed him gently, ignoring the weight of the bracelet on his wrist as he pulled away.

“Goodnight, Agent Stern. I’ll see you at breakfast.”

Stern stood in place, stunned as he watched Barclay grab his keys and rush out of Amnesty Lodge. He ran his fingertips over his lips, trying to replay the brief press over and over again. Joseph Stern was a federal agent and he refused to fail the task he came to Kepler for. But he also wouldn't mind if finding Bigfoot took a little longer than planned.

**Author's Note:**

> hmmmmmm the lonely really jumped out


End file.
